LOVE
The word love has been abused by many. A lot of us define love as a feeling, an emotion, passion, romance, happiness and all the flowery, nicey actions that send happy signals to our souls. We simply love love (lol who doesn’t). We enjoy it. In fact, the majority of us desire to have love in our lives. And while these definitions are not wrong, love goes beyond them.
We find a lot of people defining the subject of love based on their varied experience level; whether it’s a love experienced from a parent, a date, a friend, a spouse, a gesture, or God, – the love we express is mostly rooted in something beyond the surface others see. What does Love mean to you?
The media has become the number one medium through which we consume the message of love. Nowadays you find a lot of couple goals related videos on display on Instagram and TikTok and immediately your brain picks that and wants that. For real though if you are looking for a place to learn the skill of comparison I’d gladly recommend social media. You will have a PhD honours at the end. You will find the perfect fairytale video to tell you to upgrade your love levels. You will also find the kind of love stories that yearn for your attention in line waiting to just meet you. Videos like two people who deeply fall in love and are attracted to each other and how you desire that. If I am truly being sincere, these videos to a great extent have questioned my own inputs/efforts, love, family, relationship and others, almost making me feel less or inadequate most of the time. The packaging of the videos is so good we want to buy it. How it’s projected is how we are conditioned to receive it. We embrace love to the measure of what we see. We compare, evaluate, analyse and with great expectation pray to walk in what we watch.
LOVE is a commitment. Love is a Garden. Love is a sacrifice. Love is a decision. Love is a choice. Love is a position. God is Love. Love is selfless. Love is unconditional (agape). Love is unique. Love is patient. Love is kind.
After 5 plus years of marriage my position on marriage is completely based on 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 ESV
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 ESV
[4] Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant [5] or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; [6] it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. [7] Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
My early years of marriage were hard because my expectations weren’t met thanks to telenovelas. I believed I was in the wrong marriage. I yearned for divorce so badly and wished I could walk away. Ah, the number of times I’d ask for a divorce, lol. I wasn’t happy and neither was my partner. I will try all the Facebook and Instagram strategies but it still wasn’t working. I even tried Therapy but still It was tough (super tough) when we tried to be in control. We will say one thing and do the opposite. Our strength kept failing, so did our marriage. Our tears in those early years were more than our laughs. It was difficult. Far from what we envisioned it to be.
Eventually we realised our lens for Love was flawed. Our foundation was weak. Our mindset of love needed reevaluation. We were missing the point – understanding TRUTH. The Truth being Christ, if we wanted to love and love right Christ was and is the foundation we need. We needed to build the Marriage on and in HIM. We needed to surrender our will to him. We need a funeral to self and a rebirth in Christ. We needed to walk and live and be in Christ to truly reflect and express the fullness of the Love of God to the people around us. Once that is settled then our foundation becomes strong enough for the Father to pour and invest in us by God’s grace.
God is LOVE, to LOVE to know and let him dwell in you.
Amen.